Unrecognized Damage

Sometimes we don't realize the amount of damage a person has done to us until much later. For example I was attempting to fix breakfast and I kept messing things up and then managed to burn my finger. Now don't think I'm a completely awful cook I most definitely am not, just breakfast isn't my thing.
Needless to say I was feeling like a failure due to burning myself out of my own stupidity and not getting the eggs to cook the way I want. Also I can be a perfectionist so this just doesn't go over well anyways. Burning myself was the last straw so I woke up my boyfriend and said I may as well stop trying to pretend I'm good at this wifey stuff and that there was food in the kitchen but I wasn't sure how good it would be.
While I was married one of the common fights that occurred was about me not cooking. Now I'm cooking more because I want to and I don't completely hate it, but there's a fear that I'll disappoint my boyfriend, that he'll be mad if I don't cook, if I mess up while cooking, etc. However, I know he isn't that way. He cooks, I cook. He likes my cooking, says I'm a good cook. He's understanding and always appreciates what I do even if it doesn't turn out as I hope. My fear isn't from him it's from all the fights I had before I ever even knew he existed.
As I attempted not to cry he held me and told me everything was ok. He kissed my head and assured me as he always does. Never tearing me down, always building me up.
I'm sad that the fights from before can still cause this fear, however without them I could never appreciate what a great guy my boyfriend is.